"...and another huge endorsment coming from...where?"

With "super tuesday" just around the corner I feel that all my undecided voters out there need some guidance from their friendly 16 year old high school punk, me. Sure, I have never experienced the nervousness and anticipation of casting your ballot. Yeah, I don't know how to apply for an absentee ballot. And its true that I have never been a victim of voter intimidation at the local polling station. So how can I make a heartfelt presidential endorsement? Bitch, I don't need reasons.

But seriously, what does a high school know about politics? On the whole, jack shit. That's right, most of my friends don't care and there are girls in some of my classes who probably can't pronounce politics (pahl-i-Tiks). But the select few of us out there care, and care deeply. Somehow I still have quite a bit of free time even with swimming and the devil work assigned constanly by teachers. MSNBC, the Daily Show, newspapers, and that stupid AOL homepage newfeed all give me a constant flow of updates from the torrent that is the river of American with a capitol 'A' politics. In fact I would argue that I'm much more up to date than many would think. For instance, do you know who Bhutto was? Do you know which candidates won Iowa? How many have died in Kenya? Ohh, you don't know? Just ask me.

Now the important part. In the wake of the much influential Kennedy endorsement, I felt the nation could no longer wait for my own opinion as to who could best kick ass. Many factors come into play, such as the economy, wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, healthcare, enviornmental responsibility and the concern of electing a candidate who is way old. So John Mccain, you're a great guy, but your commitment to the war and extreme 'old' just don't do it for me. As for you Romney, honestly I feel no allegiance to you at all even though you're from MI. And while your business background could help economic concerns that are more really than concerns, I just don't like you much. Hillary, what can I say? I bet you'd do just fine, although on some occasions you do seem to be a bit bitchy. I just think that barack could do better. The image of change is an apealing one, and have you heard him talk? If he told me to jump off a bridge I might just do it. His policies and my ideals mesh, and thats what you look for in a candidate. So if I could cast my ballot I would definately Barrack the Vote. But I can't, so it doesn't really matter. Remember, "Only those who aspire to be slaves take no part in their government". Word.

Just an FYI, I totally called Huckabee and Obama in Iowa. You gotta like Huckabee too, he's gives a good vibe and the whole southern baptist thing doens't really concern me that much, but like I said, that's just me. Word x2.

the third first day

(kid rock, a famous but controversial m.n.r.)

so after those bitchin' finals that were deemed necessary all last week, I'm back to it- but with new classes!?!? Whooooaahh, I know, semesters are crazy. Almost as crazy as getting the same spanish teacher for a second semester in row who you don't...get along with. But anyway, the highlight was definately MNR. That's Michigan Natural Resources for all you ecological laymen out there. A class devoted entirely to Michigan's natural world with a teacher who enjoys his job, what more could I ask for? I didn't even get homework in that class, what a guy. The last thing we did after ) decided to explain his cell phone policy for a half and hour was to go over the first five animals that would be on our quiz. 1) American Robin, novice stuff really. Although the bird's call is fair game on a test, but I'm not worried. 2) Ruffed Grouse, intermediate difficulty, although I was the only one in the class to modestly and with a sense of embarassment say, "yes i do believe that is the ruffed grouse". 3) Red Winged Black Bird, we listen to the call and after el maestro related the call of the bird to spring I knew exactly what he was talking about, and could feel that warm breeze and lack of brown slush in the streets. 4) Racoon. I learned all I needed to know about this clever mammal from "The Great Outdoors". If you don't know what I'm talking about you haven't lived. 5) Wood Duck, once again, the only one who knew it, but I mean c'mon, its a wood duck.



Another highlight was the description of the trip up north over a weekend in May to help the forest service count grouse in the woods. You know how cool that is to me? That's like season tickets to Tigers' games along with your best friends and all the ladies, and somehow working a camio by Bill Murray in there.

On second thought maybe not, but counting birds in the woods is still pretty cool. And equally as cool was when he said, "Ya, fyi to all you juniors out there, when the seniors leave we'll be spending most every class at Maybury". Double score. Do I even need to explain this gem? I think not.

(ohh, and while looking for a picture for this post I stumbled across UofM's School of Natural Resources and Enviornment. aaaahhhh, shit, better watch out now, clay's narrowing down his college search!?!?!) Word.

my first...

my first snowfight

and my first degree

and my first inside-the-parker
and my first swim meet
and one of my first "big brothers are cool" moments
my first time giving into peer pressure and my first motocross

and my first brown trout

I haven't added too many pictures lately, which I realized needed to change. And since nothing too important has happened lately I decided to add some old family classics. Hope you enjoyed. Word.

walter is gone...as is the happiness

I realize that most posts lately have related to swimming, and at first glance this one will too, but I promise you that this issue reaches deeper than doing laps, this is an issue about respect.

Last night at Walled Lake Western High School, our mascot and boy, Walter, was kidnapped. Some punk ass bitches came in through the fire escape door, grabbed the camel, and dashed out the door. The divers, in a case of totally unexpected heroism, sprinted after the perps outside into the arctic abyss wearing their speedos and managed to get the licsense plate of the truck.

So who is Walter? Why is he so important? I'm sad to say that I can't even give you a good awnser. You see, Walter is a plastic camel who has been an integral part of our team for years. Alot of years. Walter has been on the team way, way longer than any else. I suppose that makes him around a six year super senior. He is brought to all our meets and even shows up to some practices. As with most cases, the true history about how Walter first came onto the team has been modified over the years. But this is what is known for sure: About eight to ten years ago, one of the seniors in an act of bravery stole a camel from a nativity scene. I know what you're thinking, and it was the camel okay, not like he stole baby Jesus. Anyways, Walter found his niche on the team until he was kidnapped by Stevenson. Those bitches. Of course we got him back, I guess. Anyways, that was all before my time. But this is the defining moment of my, and others like me, swim season. How we respond to this travesty is...a big deal.

Dually noted by Rich. Although at pratice today he didn't specifically adress the Walter incident, we could tell what he want. "How stupid are these kids? Show up to the San Diego Zoo and start putting their fingers in the cage. They keep messin' with us, and you know what? Someone's gonna get their arm bit off." Just remebering that epic current event style speech makes me crave uncooked red meat.

So let me conclude with a message to the individuals who have done this. You've taunted the tiger. The tiger is pissed. The tiger is gonna bite your goddamn head off. We're the tiger, and we're not leaving our boy behind. Consider yourself warned.

wildcats = sucky mascot name

Tonight we swam Novi and beat their asses like Seabass would have had he caught Jim and Jeff at that diner in Dumb and Dumber. Anyways the meet was such a big deal that I decided to wear my bow tie to school. Literally, I walked into the main enterance and women immediately jumped on me, grabbing and touching. My tie is that 'hot'. I watched about 4 youtube video tutorials and took alot of trial and error time to finally figure it out, but next time I'm at a wedding I'll have it all down. So ya, the tie was sexy.

But I digress, we kicked Novi's ass, really bad. We may have 1-2-3-4'd every event. Seeing as how we're the only team that is capable of beating Novi sports, we take full advantage. We domesticated and declawed them, at home. Word.

'tis the shiz

Wow. What a monday morning, beyond words. A roller coaster of emotion, ending in that all disappointing slow and steady trip back to normalcy. An email was sent out to the team on friday saying, most importantly, "NO AM practice monday". Reading this Sunday afternoon, I felt I could now put off the starting of my English project that was due today off until Sunday night. Well Sunday night comes around and I get a call from one of our captains, "ya, we have practice tomorrow morning". Shhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. I collapsed on the freezing wood floor to gather myself. It took a while, but I finally got up, finished my other junk, and went to bed, where I proceeded to roll around for about two hours thinking about how bad it is that I can't fall asleep.

4:42- I wake up and look at the alarm, frustrated that I'm going to be getting up in 3 minutes and decided to space out.

5:05- Walk across the salt and trash tundra that is the NHS parking lot in the 12 degree plus windchill heatwave.

5:22.38- While stretching on the mats, Rich says we're starting to taper. Holy Shit! Taper! Taper is the shit, its the most fantabulous time of the season. We swim virtually no distance, not very fast, and no more morning practice. This morning was the last morning practice of the season. My happiness was beyond words.

5:35- Fire alarm goes off. What the hell? Its like 2 degrees out and there's a fire? Must have been some punk ass freshman. Rich went out to find out was causing this damn annoying strobe and horn thing to disturb our practice. We continued to warm up and I thought about who I would be willing to sacrifice to the flames should we somehow not have enough room in the pool for everyone. A certain few came up, and many dumb ass freshman. We were told to "sit tight" for a second in the confusion of that early morning. He comes back five minutes later and says, "Hey, what's that hallway over there? Ya, well there's a river in it. Ya man I know, it was like a torrent coming from these broken pipes. There's no way you're having school today". While hearing about taper was great, being assured that school was going to be canceled was a step up to legendary. Everybody in the pool started yelling, thanking Jesus Christ our Savior, clapping, and in some cases even crying. It was one of the happiest moments of my life.

6:30- After finishing practice we sent a freshman out into the hallway in speedo and all to check if there were people in the halls. "Yes". Damnit, we were so close. There's a river in the middle of the damn hallway and we still have school? Shit. I needed a great shower session to relieve my stress.

6:30- 6:36- Waited for the shower (Neil) to warm up. Ohh, I know why it took so long, because all the damn water is in the hallway. Shit!

6:30-6:45- Attempt to shampoo/condit. in the ice cold turned scalding hot water. Extremely frustrating

6:46- Vented anger by killing a man

7:00- Get dressed and go to class. So close.

To make matters worse, Bob, our assistant coach was at practice today as well as Rich. This is never a good sign due to the fact that all Bob does is yell about streamlining off turns and other technical stuff like that. Needless to say as I meandered onto the deck trying my speedo and looked up to see Bob, I could only say, "aww shit, what's up Bob" "Hah, not too much Clay" He was holding a water polo ball, and I had to ask, "we playin' water polo today Bob" "Hah, nice try". It was then that I knew I had to steal Bob's ball, he was enjoying it too much. I snuck up behind him and tried to strip it out of his burly arms. I almost had it until something hard hit my lip. "Shit Bob, your class of '96 ring cut me. I'm bleeding all over, I can't swim today Bob" "It's class of '92" "Shit, you are old". Then I swam a bitching practice. The end. Feel free to share any past or current monday stories. Word.

-1

Today is a bittersweet reminder of what used to be. One of my three remaining anglefish died today, or possibly any one of the last couple of days. While it was sad to see such an old fish die, I don't think I'll miss him. Maybe that makes me a horrible person, but maybe not. I've had that fish longer than Rocky. Five years and all that damn fish did was sit in the corner of the tank. A beautifully decorated tank with tetras and plants and rocks and other anglefish, and he didn't do squat. Maybe if he'd have played fetch or something like Rocky does I'd have felt a little worse this morning as I scooped him out of the tank. Not too many memories with that guy.

Anyways, if I had to guess a cause of death, I'd say he literally froze to death. The icebox that is the basement combined with the 8 degree highs we've been having in lovely metro detroit to kill my fish. It's probably a little warmer in the Amazon. Good thing it's trash night tonight. Word.