belated st. patricks day joke

I heard this one in european history as told by mr. dent while he was trying to explain social darwainism. Enjoy:

Well, in his small town everybody knew Patrick as the local drunk. On weekends and even on some weeknights he could probably be found at the local pub complaining to the bartender, sympathizing with the patrons. One night Patrick stayed at the pub particularly late after a particularly hard day of work in his dreary cubicle. He stays until around two o'clock in the morning until he decides to leave the bar and go home before his wife, Kelly, gets too upset with him. But Patrick has had so many drinks that he falls out of his stool and has to crawl to the door. At the exit he tries to prop himself up using the doorway for support but he falls in the mud outside the doorstep. In the rain he drags himself to the bus stop where the driver, noticing Patrick lying near the road stops and opens the door, "Patrick, ya drunk, get in the bus, and hurry!" Patrick tries to use the handles on the three stairs leading into the bus, but again is unable to lift himself. He crawls and finds a seat while the driver takes him to his house. "Patrick, we're here, this is your stop. May God protect you because I 'ave no doubt in me mind that you're wife will be waiting for you. Now get off the bus you drunk!". Again Patrick crawls up the front walk and into the house, quitely opens the front door and stops on the landing inside. Listening intently he hears Kelly's snoring and continues slowly up the stairs until he gets in the bedroom and slides himself into bed.

The next morning as Patrick comes down the stairs to Kelly's freshly made breakfast she yells at him, "Patrick McClaughlin! You were out drinking last night again while I waited for you with dinner for three hours! Three hours Patrick!". He tries to defend himself as he hoists himself into his chair, "How do you know that, woman? I was in bed early last night!". With a suprised look on her face Kelly yells, "Because Patrick, you left your wheelchair at the pub!"